about this blog

Others want it hard, others semi-hard. A few have it poached from them. The rest wants the freakin’ cacophony of an omelette. As for me, I want it sunny side up – life, that is.

Tuesday, November 4, 2014


“I don’t know how to start this,” he said. I wanted to help him, but I couldn't.

I have no clue what’s been going on his mind for months now. All we've had were dry exchanges of hi’s and hello’s. But on that day, I know the words he’ll be uttering in a few minutes. I've heard them before. I've uttered them before. I remember the way it will feel but I can never be prepared for it. I couldn’t help him.

“I met someone else.”

I laughed. He must be kidding. I hope.

I instinctively looked around for cameras, caught glimpse of the people around us. Everything seemed normal sans his flushed face. I felt sick on the inside as I begged for it to be a bad joke.

The details of what happened next, now forever etched on my memory. How his hands shook as he went on with his story. How it seemed like hours being on that table with him. How my self-worth dissolved in front of a person I no longer knew.

I had a feeling we could have been just biding our time but no one told me it could be over too soon. That in every crank of the years and the gears and the tears, a screw or two will get loose.

I should have known.


Ryan See said...

I don't know what to say. Hugs, my friend.

NOX said...

Hi, Ryan! No longer applicable in real life. LOL

Let's have coffee with the gang soon, yes?

Ryan See said...

I'll be in Jap and Nikki's birthday bash. See you there. :)

LoF said...

i don't understand the clarification "no longer applicable to real life".

citybuoy said...

Ang kirot nito ha, in fairness. And yes, what do you mean by that disclaimer? Did you get back together or was this a painful memory exhumed?

the geek said...

they often start with "“I don’t know how to start this" or "Can we talk".


NOX said...

@Ryan See you!

@LoF Thanks for visiting! It means I'm fine now :)

@citybuoy The latter. But the breakup did us good. We grew up.

@thegeek Very true. I also am guilty in relaying this sorry breakup line.

Seth said...

My excuse would often be:

this is not working out

i am not happy anymore

but never would I admit I met someone else

red the mod said...

It never actually ends when it ends. It's a mere finality, a bookend, a closing gesture. That last nail that shuts the coffin.

The end happens way before, sometime ago when the anxiety begins to creep in; subtle at first then escalating to an undeniable crescendo. You'll try again, and again to deny this; filling in unspoken excuses for broken promises.

But, eventually, the ball drops.

Which is, quite frankly, a beginning in itself. Life, must, go on.